Merry Christmas, I guess...

Christmas isn't exactly my favorite time of the year. My feelings have been like this pretty much since 1990 when my granny died right before Christmas. It continued three years later when my grandpa died right before Christmas. Two years ago, I lost a good friend, Sandy, right before Christmas in a horrific car accident. I don't know, to me this time of the year just gets depressing and nothing seems to go right.

This year has proven spectacularly disastrous for my family and friends. Late Saturday, the husband of one of my best friend's at work lost his long, hard-fought battle with cancer. Mrs. Summers, a friend of the family passed away on Tuesday. My friend Clint lost his grandfather on Tuesday morning. This afternoon, my Aunt Sue passed away.

And if you live anywhere in the Bootheel, you've heard about the accident my father was involved in and the resulting death of Mr. Downing. What makes matters worse is that I occasionally visit a hateful site called Topix and read the Malden forum. I've read posts that are funny, posts that are ridiculous, but overall, the posts are downright hateful. Anyone and everyone can be targeted from school teachers, to business owners, council members, principals, firefighters, police officers, you name it. To me, it seems that the primary purpose of this website is to destroy reputations and lives. Here for your reading pleasure is a lovely little post I copied and pasted directly from Topix concerning the ACCIDENT on Saturday. Yeah, it kind of got under my skin.

Paid Firefighter
Saint Louis, MO
Reply »
|Report Abuse |Judge it! |#8 Yesterday
Judged:
1
"Another case of a Vollie Firefighter running his blue light thinking he's a real professional firefighter. I hope the Downing family sues the hell out of this guy. Nine chances out of ten the guy was flying to a grass fire or some call that running code 3 was not necessary. My family has known the Downing family for years, Mr. Downing was a good bussiness man he will be missed. My condolences to the family."

I tried to respond on Topix to this individual (not exactly the term I'd like to use to describe this individual). Unfortunately, either you have to be a member - which I refuse to do because unlike most people who get on that site and run their mouths, I'm not a coward and will own up to words that are my own- or my post was too long. Either way, there are some things I'd like to say.

1. People in Malden should be grateful there are a bunch of "Vollie Firefighters" who are willing to serve. Without them, there wouldn't be fire protection. Currently the only full time employees of the fire department in Malden are 4 drivers. Only 2 are on duty at a time. The last time I checked, it generally takes more than 2 people to fight a fire or perform an extrication.

2. It's easy to critizice people when you sit behind a computer and won't use your real name. As a matter of fact, I think it makes people much bolder. They will say things about people that they wouldn't have the courage to say to their faces. Interesting how the computer age has inspired this kind of "courage". Out of all the posts on Topix concerning the accident, only one person, Ken Ozbun, used their real name. I tried, but like I said, my post never appeared. I did use my real name - I guess I sometimes am a little bit courageous, or a little bit pissed off, if you want to know the truth. Although he'll probably never read this, I'd like to tell Ken thank you for what you posted. You basically got to the heart of what I had to say. Maybe coming from a "professional" ems person, the point will be taken more seriously.

3. Yes, my father is a volunteer firefighter. Most small towns in the Bootheel rely on those volunteer firefighters. My father has been working for the Malden Fire Department in one form or another for 40 years come February. During those 40 years, he's responded to and fought countless fires. Most of my memories of holidays, family occasions, church services, and yes, even some family funerals and visitations involve the tones dropping and my dad leaving to go help someone else out. He would come home tired, dirty, sometimes disturbed by the burned and mangled bodies he pulled out or a house or a car. I'm sure his memories are more grusome than most of us care to know. I can tell you there are things he can't and won't talk about. But here's the thing, he gets out there and does it, for much less pay than "professional firefighters" make (to the tune of $65,000-$70,000 as starting pay in some districts up here in the St. Louis area). Yes, he didn't attend the academy, but he has taken numerous classes and training seminars. He has 40 years of experience fighting fires and more years of experience working on automobiles which has definitely come in handy where extrications are concerned. I learned a long time ago that a diploma from a college, a university, or even a Fire Academy doesn't make you a professional. It's just a pretty piece of paper that you pay a lot of money to get. Professionals are created from the baptism by fire that is only learned through real world experience.

4. When the fire or emergency is at your house or concerns you, the first responders can't get there fast enough. I lived in Malden a long time, and while I'm not the brightest crayon in the box, I did observe some things. If the police and firefighters drive at a necessary speed to respond to an emergency, they drive too fast and are criticized. If they don't get there in what people consider to be an "appropriate" amount of time, they are criticized. As a matter of fact, there are several posts on the Malden forum that say that the police department and the fire department are financial drains on Malden and that the city would be better off without them. Here's the funny thing, without the fire protection currently offered by the Malden Fire Department, citizens of Malden would see their home insurance rates increase. Who would be critiziced for this -the city and the fire department. It's easy to sit an criticize and not be a part of the solution. The last time I checked, there wasn't exactly a long line of volunteers or professional firefighters lining up outside Station 3's doors on fire meeting nights to sign up to provide fire protection for the citizens of Malden.

5. " I hope the Downing family sues the hell out of this guy." Well, you can't get blood out of a turnip. My father worked in auto body shops and as a driver for the fire department and then as a teacher - none of those jobs get you rich in this lifetime, especially in the Bootheel. Any "extra" money he made as a "Vollie Firefighter" was spent long ago trying to make ends meet. My parents aren't exactly rolling in money and I seriously doubt anything they have would be worth what they would be sued for. My family is poor, plain and simple. I'll be honest, my grandparents were sharecroppers. I'm the second generation away from sharecroppers! I wonder if this comment would even be posted if my family were one of Malden's elite, supposedly wealthy families. I sincerely doubt it. But we're not one of the wealthy families; we don't belong to the country club; we're just pissants, as my mom and dad have fondly described my family's status in the popularity contest that comes with living in a small town. No matter how hard you work, it doesn't make any difference. Nothing ever changes. I don't know the Downing family well, but I hope they are not as vindictive as "Professional Firefighter" (yes, insert dripping sarcasm here in reference to his "name") hopes and apparently believes they are.

6. Here's the truth. IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!!! My father was responding to an emergency call with his lights on, his headlights flashing, the siren going, and probably blowing his horn. For whatever reason, Mr. Downing didn't see or hear him coming and pulled out into the path of my father's vehicle. You can't stop on a dime. I've been involved in a couple of accidents in my life and you don't have to be "flying" as Professional Firefighter puts it to cause quite a bit of damage. Was I there? No, I was up here in Washington. But I have read the comments and heard quite a bit about what people who did see the accident have reported. All have said that my father didn't have anywhere to go and didn't have time to stop. I do know that he tried to miss him. If you don't believe me, take a drive past Charlie Cooper's house and check out his yard and flagpole.

7. I am especially angry that some people are implying that my father was being negligent or apparently has no concern about what happened. Yes, the rumor mill even reaches four and a half hours north to Washington, MO. For those people who are implying this and spreading these rumors, it is obvious they do not know my father or my family. I have sometimes been in the car with my dad when he has had to respond to a fire or another emergency. Yeah, he didn't just pull over and kick me to the curb. The first thing he'd tell me was to put on my seatbelt. The second thing he would do was to do everything he could to alert other drivers that he was coming through. The third thing he would do would be to drive as fast as he felt was safe without endangering other drivers, himself, or me. Keep in mind that my brother was in the vehicle with him. If I know one thing, my father would rather hurt himself than hurt one of his children. Obviously since he has volunteered for years to fight fires and pull people out of mangled cars, he has more concern for others than for himself. Firefighting, even just "volunteering", is a dangerous vocation, and yes, I believe it is a calling. You have to be a special breed to run into a burning building when everyone else is running out. Yes, even in Malden, they go into the burning buildings. For anyone to say my father and my family hasn't been affected by this is lying, plain and simple. I would have no trouble telling them that to their faces. Unfortunately, having the last name of German often means that we tend to speak our minds. What I do know is that when the word came that Mr. Downing had passed away, my father and my family was extremely upset, and continue to be so. Having lost so many of our family members at Christmas, we in no way would ever wish this on anyone, especially not someone as fine as Mr. Downing was. How dare people spread these hateful lies, especially in this time of supposed good will toward all men. Right now, I'm having a hard time feeling that for some of the gossips in Malden.

8. While I grew up in Malden, had great friends (and still do have a great number of friends in Malden whom I love and respect), and received the start in education that has gotten me where I am today (THANK YOU Mrs. Rascher, Mrs. Blough, Mr. Blackiston, Mr. Carman, Mrs. Scott, Mrs. Powell, Mrs. Bess, Mrs. Bachelor, Mrs. Roth the list could go on and on), I thank the good Lord every day that I left. All I feel when I go home is an abiding sadness and depression at what my hometown has become. It is slowly, but surely dying, for a number of reasons. While I'm sure the lack of industry and the resulting lack of jobs has a great deal to do with this, I can't help but wonder if this attitude of sit back and complain about everyone and everything instead of working to make things better isn't part of the problem.

By the way, I'm not afraid to use my real name. Sincerely, Debra German