Here is why I haven't posted. This is my niece. Yes, that's a pull-up on her head. No, the cats and I will never be the same. I kept her for a week so my mom could get ready for Vacation Bible School at her church. This was a learning experience for Kenny and me. What are some of the valuable lessons we learned? Here is our list.
1. A one and a 1/2 year old is fast, lightening fast!
2. If there is a metal object within reach, a small child will find it, pick it up, locate the nearest electrical outlet without a guard, and attempt to fry him- or herself.
3. Sleep, what sleep? When they go to sleep, you better go to sleep too, but make sure you wake up first. The result of not waking up first equals a pull-up on their head and a trashed house looking like they had a toddler kegger full of milk or juice with about 50 of their closest toddler monster friends.
4. The contents of your kitchen cabinets are more enticing to them than all of the toys they have to play with, especially if they are all over the kitchen floor.
5. Make sure the knives are WAY back on the cabinet. If possible, toddlers will attempt to juggle with them.
6. If you have pets, especially cats who are your "children", and you introduce a toddler to the mix, your pets will retaliate for this introduction, specifically by peeing in your shoes. This retaliation can last for several weeks, even after the toddler has returned to their parents of origin.
7. You finally learn sympathy for your younger brother when you realize that he is SO paying for his raising with this one!
8. When toddlers find something really intriguing, they become strangely silent. Consider it the calm before the storm. I wish I would have had a picture of another humorous, yet silent, incident with the baby. While I was doing laundry, she managed to get into my bathroom, get under the sink, and I apologize for this, but she found the maxi pads, emptied half of the package, and managed to pull the paper off and stick them all over herself. All this in the space of time it took me to empty the dryer, pull the clothes out of the washer and put the new load into the dryer, and put another load into the washer, 5 minutes tops!
9. When the Infant of Prague statue in the back of church doesn't respond to a toddler offering it one of his or her highly prized, Flavor Blasted Extra Cheddar Goldfish, they get really angry and express this anger by screaming "FISH" repeatedly at the offending statue in the middle of Mass. Now I understand the value of a cry room.
10. Even though both Kenny and I have college and post-graduate degrees, we're not smart enough to outsmart a toddler. We are now seriously considering not having children.
After keeping her for a week, I was home for a week and a half helping Mom with VBS and babysitting during the day. After getting back up here last week, I attempted to return the cats and the house to normal. I've also been unpacking more of the boxes I didn't get to in the spring when we moved and getting in some valuable career ladder hours for next year.
Additional fun included being rearended this morning with Kenny and his brother. His car is kind of messed up, but thankfully not totaled. Unfortunately the other two cars that were rearended and pushed into us aren't so lucky. I figure both of them are totaled. We were stopped while another car was trying to turn left into a parking lot on Gravois with two other cars stopped behind us. An older gentleman, about 80 years old, slammed into the cars and caused a chain reaction accident. He never even hit his brakes. No one was hurt, but Kenny's car is definitely going to have to spend some time in the shop. In a weird twist of fate, I was rearended in a parking lot last month. Parmentier Autobody just loves us right now! Oh well, the damage is just to cars and that's why we have insurance.
Upcoming highlights for the summer include going to my parents for the week of the 4th, having my niece and nephew up for some annual visits to such exciting places as Grant's Farm, the Zoo, and the Butterfly House, and an upcoming trip to Atlanta and Savannah to see Kenny's brother who just moved to Atlanta in May. Pictures will be on the way. And I will be sleeping, reading all of the Harry Potter books again to get ready for the movie and the new book, and continuing to set up the house.
